Marriages in the United Arab Emirates in the pre-oil period were based in the traditional tribal kinship system. In the recent past these patterns have changed with individuals having a wider area to choose from. Effects of globalization and immigration have led to contamination of the culture. Marriage today though still concentrated with the Muslim faith requirements, reflects modernization and cultural change. This paper examines the context of marriage in the UAE with focus both in the past and the present.
Marriage is a key social rite in the UAE because it led to the establishment of the family which was highly regarded in the past in the United Arab Emirates. The family is a keysocial set-up in the culture of these people. Organization of the family is patriarchal, hierarchical and paternalistic with males having the privilege of making most of the decisions.
In the traditional setting, marriage happened in ones tribe or social group. They claim that endogamy encourages group affiliation and bonding. Marriages were usually arranged and the arrangements took some time.
Marrying non-nationals in this context was highly discouraged.There was established a state fund to reward those who married the nationals. A young man would receive up to $19,000 for marrying a national. Hasso (2011) notes that a hierarchy existed based on the one’s race and affected much the non-emirates wives. Indian children and mothers were considered to be inferior in the hierarchy. Non-emirate wives were ranked ahead of the Indians (Hasso, 2011). However, marring a white was considered as a great achievement with this being used as a determinant of social status.
In the traditional setting, women from Lebanon were accepted but with caution (Hasso, 2011). Among the immigrant wives, women from Syria were the most acceptable. From the continent of Africa, Moroccan women could not be accepted while women from Egypt were looked at as being inferior.
The Muslim faith is dominant and it dictated the marriage practices and values. Traditionally, a man was allowed to marry as many as four wives. Most of the families were of the extended kind with the aunties and uncles living in the same household. Most of these practices have witnessed a great change.
Wedding preparations and arrangements for the Emirates take longand can be enjoyable as well as tiring for the bride, bride-groom and the people helping in the preparations. Many wedding arrangements take as much as two weeks of preparation. The arrangement though is different for an Emirate with that of a non-emirate.
Culture by default is set in a way that encourages Arab ladies to take pride in their beauty and looking well. Though will spend much of their day with their cloak on, they make may visits in to the salons to get make-up and face and body treatments. A family’s responsibility includes taking care of the bride and encouraging them to eat the right foods.
Preparations during the wedding week take place both at the bride’s and the groom’s home place. The two families, however, are not allowed by norm to socialize together before the wedding day. This enhances the uniqueness of the big day and ignites a burning desire for the day as it approaches.
Wedding celebrations start with a traditional party at the bride’s place. Traditionally it has been referred to as Laylat al Henna. In the party, the bride’s friends and female relatives are invited for food, dancing and music. The celebration takes place two days before the actual day of the wedding. The bride enters into the party in style after all female guests have settled. The bride’s arrival is witnessed with playing of loud musical instruments such as shakers and drums. The ladies usually make unique cheering sound as they celebrate the bride. The bride is usually covered with a beautiful cloth well selected and is brought into the stage b a close family member.
The bride is brought towards the middle of the room where her clothes are removed. She then starts dancing with the rest of the people in the dance floor. A band in her honor is usually started at this moment and she is led to a corner of beautiful cushions for a rest. This is the point where photos are taken. The family members take the opportunity to bless the bride and shower her with gifts of money and jewelry. The henna artist also at this point decorates the bride up to the elbow. It is believed that the henna should be removed the following morning to avoid it becoming darker.
On the wedding day, an official religious ceremony that is attended by only the family takes place. There exist custom built wedding halls where such functions are held and if not so, the celebration is held in an expensive hotel. The wedding halls are designed to contain two halls in one so as to accommodate both men and women separately. Taking films is not allowed since the women may not wear their cloaks in the wedding day.
Food is served with starters being the Arab traditional food such as olives. The bride enters first accompanied by a member of her family then the groom later. The husband drops his bride at the front stage and leaves for a hall reserved for him. The female relatives of the bride at this point greet her and start dancing lavishly on stage. Males enter in a procession playing music. They bring in the groom and his family relatives. They carry traditional sticks. The sticks have a significant meaning in the culture as they denote a means of defense. The bride covers herself at this point, photos are taken and men leave as ladies continue with their dancing.
The UAE government has shown a concern in weddings and has intervened to control spending in weddings. The government established the marriage fund to regulate the extravagant spending in weddings. Large amounts of dowries used to be paid discouraging many men from marrying Emirate women and going for an alternative of non-emirates. The marriage fund is meant for the poor.
The government has also set in to build social wedding halls to limit spending in expensive hotels. In addition, the government has come up with regulations to control marriages. A minimum age of 21 has been set for the groom while for the bride is set at 18. The UAE government also encourages funding older couples to enable them start a family soon after marriage.
Marriage in the present has experienced great changes compared with the past. The present marriage has been experiencing many challenges including divorce that has warranted government intervention to resolve disputes. Bennesh (2008) notes that the government withdrew its gift of money for newlywed couples until after two years of marriage. This is after many divorces at an alarming rate even for newlywed couples.
Many emirate nationals are defying the government calls to marry emirate wives and go for non-emirates which though this is against the tradition. The government frequently publishes reports of high divorce rates to discourage the nationals from marrying foreigners (Bennesh, 2008). The growing economy has put pressure on the men to pay high dowries thus they opt to go for non-emirates who may not bother with cultural requirements.
The marriages in the UAE have in the recent past witnessed high levels of divorce and break-ups. Among the leading factors of the reasons for break ups are: infidelity, poor communication, loss of jobs and religious and cultural differences. The UAE is home to more than 200 nationalities. In such a situation, it goes without saying that intermarriages will be of high rate. When cultural differences emerge between the couples, breaking up presents as a solution to the problem.
Traditional laws and norms are usually observed in the UAE and they are attached with significant meanings. During the wedding, for example, a bride is anointed with sorts of oils. This serves as a symbol of blessing and well wishes from the family and friends. The bride’s body is cleansed with creams and conditioning oils are applied. This serves to mark a special day bin the bride’s life. An experienced artist is normally hired to decorate the brides body with henna on a per-celebration party held before the day of the wedding. The bride is at this day showered with gifts of jewelry and monies. This serves to signify that this is a great day in her life.
The traditions also have a role of demystifying the joy the two families have in seeing their children wed. Festivities of singing and dancing are usually conducted in the wedding period to connote a moment of joy to the family. In the present days however, many of these practices are done as a formality and the players do not focus much in their significance.
The Arabian kohl or eyeliner is another component of the Arabian marriages. The bride and other women line their eyes with the kohl. This serves to signify their beauty. It is used by women of all ages in the UAE and is believed also to be useful to the eyes. Although with a background of all these celebrations of marriage in their culture, the UAE government has made regulations restricting marriage parties to one day.
The definitive role of gender particularly the women have been challenged due to global trends that has seen major changes in marriage and culture (Population Reference Bureau (PRB), 2005). Majority of the Arab nationals now live in cities. This has contributed greatly to the change of roles of gender in marriages in the UAE. The family in the traditional context has been a symbol of esteem for a man. The wife views a marriage as a form of security. The resultant marriage between a man and his wife is meant to provide security to the elderly, the disabled and the sick (PRB, 2005). A family also is a source of economic support for other dependents including the youth, refugees, children and the unemployed. PRB (2005) further notes that in Arab culture, parents have a role of taking care of the children until they grow up. The children give back to the society by taking care of the elderly.
Marriage in the Arab world is both a family and individual matter. It brings about recognition, societal approval and recognition as it marks an important turning point in the life of the couple especially the bride. Marriage thus serves to mark an important rite of passage as one enters into a sexual, social relationship.
Marriage in the Arab context portrays the family as the basic unit of the society (Joseph, 1994). In the political, social and economic context, marriage has a role to play.to say the least; everything startswith a family, which is the result of a marriage. Joseph (1994) asserts that the importance, with which marriage is regarded in the UAE, has warranted its being enshrined in the constitution. The main emphasis is to recognize the family as the basic unit of the society. According to the culture, a family has a role to maintain the sanctity of religion. This is a reciprocal role since the religion checks and maintains the integrity of the family.
The role of gender is prevalent in Arab culture. The society is dominantly patriarchal privileging males against females. Culture teaches the female members to hold male counterparts with respect regardless of their age. Male members are supposed to take care of their female counterparts while the elderly are required to protect the young (Joseph, 1994). The gender privilege places higher authority on young males over elder females.
Culture requires that a family takes care of the financial needs of its members. The family is the source of economic empowerment. Members of the family work to help one another find work, own of businesses as well as secure employment for one another.
Marriage is also viewed to be a central political resource in the UAE. The government recognizes the family even in the allocation of its resources. Political networks are usually provided by the family. For political support, politicians will seek to know the family connections of an individual. Political sponsorships are also realized through family heads. the family has continued to be a strong political component in the society, owing to its emphatic reference in political issues. With the society favoring patriarchy, the politics also have privileged males against females.
Marriage in the United Arab Emirates is an important rite of passage. It leads to creation of a basic social-economic, political unit of the society, the family. Globalization and immigration has led to changes in the practice of marriage in the UAE in the past, compared with the present.
Reference
Bennesh, C. (2008).Culture Shock! UAE: A Survival Guide to Customs and Etiquette. Tarrytown. NY: Marshall Cavendish Corporation.
Joseph, S. (1994). Gender and Family in the Arab World. Women in the Middle East: Images and Reality, 119, 194-199
Hasso,F. (2011).Consuming desires: Family Crisis and the State in the Middle East. Stanford: Stanford University Press.
Population Reference Bureau (PRB). (2005).Marriage in the Arab World. Washington: Population Reference Bureau.