compare and contrast .

Why Do Athletes Make Good Role Models        by Laura Williams Adapted from:  http://www.livestrong.com/article/374758-why-do-athletes-make-good-role-models/

As many as 59 percent of adolescents can identify a role model in their lives, according to research published in the January 2011 issue of the “Journal of Adolescent Health.” Of the adolescents with role models, those that looked to athletes were more likely to make positive health-related decisions. The fact is, not all athletes are positive role models; unfortunately some athletes engage in negative behavior.  However, overall, the athletic lifestyle lends itself to a position of positive role modeling for adolescents.

Engaging in Physical Activity
To stay on top of their game, athletes have to engage in regular, vigorous activity. In a relatively sedentary culture where much of life revolves around TV shows and video games, athletes model the benefits of physical activity to children and adolescents in a very real way. Athletes make a living from being fit, healthy and strong. Just by hitting the field or the court, athletes give children the opportunity to see that physical activity has the ability to pay off.

Confidence
One of the reasons girls should play sports is for the boost in confidence they receive, according to the TeensHealth website. You can see this confidence in action when watching professional athletes. On the field and off the field, athletes embody a sense of confidence in themselves and their team. This sense of confidence is one of the reasons that athletes make good role models — they show young people how important it is to believe in themselves and those around them.

Work Ethic
Athletes have to work hard to stay on top of their game. The time baseball players dedicate to the sport goes well beyond the two- or three-hour daily practice. They spend time stretching, watching video tape and working on their swing. Then they hit the gym and lift weights or hit the field to work on their speed. They may spend six to eight hours a day just on baseball, plus the time traveling on buses and playing in doubleheaders on the weekends. Adolescents who see athletes as role models learn to mimic the work ethic that it takes to become a top athlete.

Education
Athletes learn early that if they want to play the game, they have to make the grades. Even as early as middle school athletics, a failing grade will prevent an athlete from being allowed to play. When youth look to high school, college or professional athletes as role models, they understand that those athletes had to make a commitment both on and off the field to excellence. High school athletes won’t play if they don’t make the grades. Colleges will only recruit athletes that can get accepted into their school; then athletes can only play if they pass their classes. In addition, while some professional athletes get drafted straight out of high school, most still have to prove themselves as college athletes to get a look. It’s a chain that requires at least some dedication to academics to succeed as a money-making athlete.

Flesch-Kincaid Reading Level:  9.6

Why Sports Stars Should Not Be Role Models    by Martin J. Greenberg
Adapted from:  http://www.jsonline.com/news/opinion/why-sports-stars-should-not-be-role-models-b9967929z1-218441621.html

It was difficult to explain to my 7-year-old grandson, an avid baseball and Milwaukee Brewers fan, why MVP Ryan Braun was no longer in left field. Violating the rules – trying to circumvent a level playing field by taking a competitive advantage and deceiving the public, his employer, teammates and friends – was a difficult explanation for a 7-year-old to comprehend.  His response, however, was interesting:  “I don’t think Ryan Braun is my favorite player anymore.”  How disappointing it was to see the player possessed of Hank Aaron wrists take a shocking fall from grace.
It brings to light the ever-nagging problem as to how we view professional athletes.  Dedication, physical prowess, work ethic, perseverance, sacrifice and teamwork are characteristics that set them apart.  Professional athletes’ on- and off-the-field flamboyance, larger-than-life persona and constant limelight presence make them unforgettable figures in our lives.  Should we celebrate and emulate them?
We are a nation in search of everyday heroes.  We are a nation of sports wannabes.  Professional sports give us the time and permit us to spend the money to escape the realities of our ordinary existence.  So prevalent and important is sports and the professional athlete that our youths make an attempt to mimic the behavior and dress of the most famous athletes.  It’s all about “Be like Mike.”
But mimicry is exactly where it should stop.  Once the athletes leave the playing field, their lives often take on a different dimension.  Professional athletes are just like you and me.  They have all the foibles, human deficiencies, character flaws and closet shadows as do all other human beings.
It is extremely difficult for a professional athlete to sustain a squeaky clean image with today’s non-stop media coverage and exposure, and it is even more difficult for athletes to escape the consequences of their errors.  Sometimes, the sports pages read like a criminal rap sheet with reports of anti-social behavior ranging from alcoholism, DUIs, sexual abuse, substance abuse, deceit, paternity, gambling and now even murder.  Major League Baseball suspended 13 more players Monday as part of its Biogenesis investigation.  Certainly some of our most idolized sports heroes have been great disappointments, such as Lance Armstrong, Barry Bonds, Tiger Woods, O.J. Simpson and Pete Rose, to name a few.
By casting athletes as role models, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment.  We need to readjust our expectations for athletes once the game is over.  We require athletes to be more than what they are, and we scorn athletes for what they are not.  Even worse, if they win, we forgive and forget.
Athletes get paid to beat opponents; athletes don’t get paid to be paradigms of morality.  In our sports-crazed society, too much emphasis is put on the athletic enterprise.   Professional sports is a big business — one of the largest business enterprises in American society — and has become an industry of multimillion-dollar contracts and an invasion of corporate America.  Let’s not forget, we’re talking about games and a form of entertainment.
Maybe professional athletes should be role models, but they aren’t.  Former NBA player Charles Barkley said it so well, “I’m not a role model.  Just because I dunk a basketball doesn’t mean I should raise your kids.”   We must put our perspectives in balance.  Emulate doctors who save lives, lawyers who protect the constitutional rights of citizens, professors who light up bright minds, scientists who make life-changing discoveries, an artist who creates a work of art and the wealthy who share their fortune for a worthy cause.
The heroes in our life — those who we should emulate and place on a pedestal — are those people who teach us right from wrong.  Hopefully that is a parent’s obligation to mold their children in their formative years and teach them responsibility and accountability.  Responsible parents should be our real role models — not rock stars, Hollywood, celebrities or professional athletes.
We are a nation that forgives and forgets.  We are a nation that grants second chances.  We don’t care if professional athletes screw up unless they screw up with the football in their hands.  Don’t confuse game statistics with character.  Braun will be given another chance to excel on the field, and we may forgive, but we will never forget.

Martin J. Greenberg is a Milwaukee attorney who teaches a course at Marquette University Law School on representing athletes and coaches.

Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level:  10.1

Final Draft 78:
Too many grammar errors for a final draft, including some errors I marked on the first draft. You have to find and correct most of your grammar errors in order to pass the 8th week test. Work on comma splices!

Teacher: Lynne Walker
EAP 121 (Essay 1 Final Draft)
Kevin Zhang (Hangxing Zhang)
26/10/2014
How to be a healthy person
People probably know this question, but are they really healthy? The answer is no. Most people think there is not much difference between each other because they don’t know what exactly issues are hiding in their body. As times goes on, people’s lives are getting busy and complex because our pace of life is increasing. People become serious about their life quality which connects to contemporary health. How to be a healthy person? As my personal consideration, there are three major parts that influence our health: diet, mental health, and exercise.
At first, what I want to talk about is healthy diet. As human beings, we need food to keep our body working, but to eat is not good enough, eating healthy is also very important. Nowadays, because of work and school, a large amount of students and workers skip their breakfast, but what they don’t know is that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Not eating breakfast will seriously affect people’s intelligence and brain development. Another example that I want to talk about is fast food and I think everyone already knows it’s a big common health concern. The obesity is affecting America badly. I have a friend who moved to the United States when he was a kid, he started eating very unhealthy food such as hamburgers, pizzas, and sodas by the spoil? of his parents. Then he’s body gets high blood pressure and a lot of other issues. Healthy diet is taking a huge role in being a healthy person and if people really want to be healthy, they have to get rid of their bad eating habits and start a healthy diet routine.
The second major part to become a healthy person is positive mental status. A lot of people are suffering from mental problems in society nowadays. People are getting stressed by the small problems they have in their daily lives and always give up onwc their mental health for things like their grades in school and performance at work. What they have forgotten is that mental health is very important for a personro if you feel unhappy for most of the time, life will be really hard for you and there is no way that you can have a healthy body. So, to stay positive in your daily life is indispensable when the problem comes, try to face it and don’t over stress yourself too much. It happened to me before, I got depressed and missed classes because of my parent’s business issues and so diddel my girlfriend left me alone, I felt I lost everything in the world. After a long period, I subsided myself and then realized that the only person I can depend on is myself and I started to looking at the bright side of the world, and changed myself back to the world.? unclear
The last part is about exercise. Working and studying are taking over most of the time from us; Most of people are forgetting the importance of exercise. Appropriate exercise would help to prevent disease, promote the body’s resistance and relieve pressure. Exercise doesn’t mean we have to play sports like soccer or football, just a bit of walking would also help with our body. So just wake up a little earlier every day and take a little walk outside, it will really help with your body. I have an elder relative who is 70 years old and has been doing mountain walk over ten years, now he’s very healthy and strong. He doesn’t even looks like a 70 years old man.
After all, if you want to be a healthy person, you have to be serious with your own body first. Start with keeping a positive mood, then eat healthy and have some appropriate exercise which will lead you to a healthy life. “The body of revolution, a capital, life, health is wealth” like the quote says, I don’t understand the quote. before anything else in life, we have to take care of our health first.

EAP 121 Composition Evaluation

CONTENT:                                     __25__/30
Does the essay follow the assignment’s instructions? (About 500 words, correct topic, etc.)
Is there a clear and effective thesis listing the three sub-topics?
Are there 3 clear and effective topic sentences addressing the three sub-topics?
Are there enough supporting details?No. Specific examples are needed to strengthen body paragraphs
Is the essay unified, (i.e. are the details relevant to the thesis)?
Are the ideas clear?Improved grammar and specific examples will make ideas more clear

ORGANIZATION:                                __30__/30
Is there a clear introduction, body and conclusion?
Does the body include three body paragraphs?
Is the essay coherent, (i.e. are the details and paragraphs in logical order)?
Are there effective transitions that aid coherence?
Is the thesis located in an appropriate place, the last sentence of the introduction?

MECHANICS:                                __15__/30
Does the writer demonstrate control of:
sentence construction?
word order?
verb tenses?
verb forms?
word forms? (n, v, adj, adv)
subject/verb agreement?
singular or plural nouns?
vocabulary? (word choice)
articles (a, an, the) and prepositions?
spelling and capitalization?
punctuation and indentation?
person? (no inappropriate shifts in 1st, 2nd, or 3rd person)
proper format/12 pt. font/double-spaced/name/word count, etc.?

OVERALL IMPRESSION:                            ___5_/10
This is the general, overall impression of the
essay—the effect on the reader.

TOTAL:      _75___/100
Good start!
Strengthen your body paragraphs with specific examples.
Work on grammar. You will need to find and correct your grammar errors to pass the 8th week test.
Correct and re-submit to raise your grade.

?Please note: Late essays will receive a 10-20% deduction, and no
essay will be accepted one week after the due date.

Teacher: Lynne Walker
EAP 121 (Essay 1 Rough Draft)
Kevin Zhang (Hangxing Zhang)
16/10/2014
How to be a healthy person
People probably know this question, but are they really healthy? The answer is no. Most people think there areS-V not much difference between each other because they don’t know what exactly issues are hiding in their body. For instance, adipose, high blood pressure, melancholia, and anxiety.FRAG As times goes on, people’s life vf getting busy and complex because our pace of life is increasing. People becoming to valueunclear their life quality which connects to contemporary health. So how to be a healthwf person? AsIn my personal consideration, there are three major parts that influence our health: diet, mental health, and exercise.
art First part I want to talk about is healthy diet. As human beings, we need food to keep our body working, but to eat is not good enough, eatvf healthy is also very important. Nowadays, because of work and school, a large amount of students and workers skip their breakfast, but what they don’t know is that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Not eating breakfast will seriously affects people’s intelligence and brain development. Another example that I want to talk about is fast food,cs I think everyone already knows it’s a big common health concern,cs the obesity it causedvt-pres perf is affecting America badly. Can you give a specific example of someone who has eaten too much fast food and been unhealthy, but has changed? However,wc healthy diet is taking has? a hug? role ofiin being a healthy person and if people really want to be healthy, they have to get rid of their bad eating habits/pl and startingwf a healthy diet routine.
The second major part to become a healthy person is to keep withdelete positive mental status. A lot of people are suffering from mental problems in society now days. People verb always getting stressed by the small problems they have in their daily lives,cs they always give up on their mental heathsp for other thingsWhat do you mean? Please explain. What they have forgotvf is that mental health is very important for a person,cs if you feel unhappy for most of the time, life will be really hard for you and there is no way that you can have a healthwf body. So, to stay positive onprep your daily life is indispensable,cs when the problem comes, try to face it,cs don’t over stress yourself too much.Give a SPECIFIC example here of someone who struggles to care for their mental health.
YOU NEED TO SELF-EDIT THE NEXT TWO PARAGRAPHS. THIS MEANS FIND AND CORRECT YOUR GRAMMAR ERRORS TO PREPARE FOR THE 8TH WEEK TEST.
Then, the last part, exercise. Working and studying are taking over most of the time from us, most people are forgetting the importance of exercise. Appropriate exercise would help to prevent disease, promote the body’s resistance, and relieve pressure. Exercise doesn’t mean we have to go play sports like soccer or football, just a bit of walking would also help with our body. So, just wake up a little earlier everyday and take a little walk outside, it will really help with your body.
After all, if you want to be a healthy person, you have to be serious with your own body first. Start with keeping positive mood, then eat healthy and have some appropriate exercise will lead you to a healthy life. “the body of revolution, a capital, life, health is wealth” before anything else in life, we have to take care of our health first.

The prompt of the essay is (compare and contrast the similarities and differences between the classical civilization of the Maya (250-900 CE) and Maurya/Gupta India (320 BCE – 550 CE)). Also the format/instruction is on the file that ive attached