appealing a decision

Paper details:

Unfortunately, I have received a denied admission for Spring 2016 from the university of W-M. write a strong email demonstrating compelling academic and/or personal information, as well as details pertaining to extenuating circumstances that were not addressed in my previous application.
Here is the information to be included in my email. Please make sure to clearly outline the reasons.
I think the first reason why they are unable to offer me an admission is because they have received the English proficiency which is the IELTS score too late. In fact, the delay was from the testing agency, and I have contacted them many times in order to have my results sent to the university’s office, but it took a quit long time to arrive. It was out of my hand, and I strongly believe that this the first reason why they turned away my application. However, I have got an overall band 6.5 on IELTS test, and that the score they need.
I attained infallible academic achievement in my high school level. I occupied the first place over my region which is with a mean score of 98.8% in the overall science subjects. This achievement has merited the attention of many scholarships and corporations in my country which offered me opportunity to study in USA. However, I chose the Emirates Nuclear Energy Corporation (ENEC) which offered to sponsor my university education in the field of engineering at the university of W-M.
I have completed level seven (the last level of Language program) at Georgia . I got straight A’s and that is difficult for students to achieve in the last level since they have many works to do such doing research papers ,preparing for the presentations, reading one whole book every weekend ,and participating in community service. In addition, I have been an active member in discussion groups. Also, I took service learning course at the language institute, which will definitely assist me well to contribute. For example, recently, I have volunteered at the Community Food bank.
Finally, my mother has been divorced since 1998, and I have been living with her in the same house, and father lives far away from us to avoid staying in touch with us, but it doesn’t matter as long as I live between my mother’s hands. She always wants me to be in higher positions so that she can be proud of me. And in order to be so, I have considered the university of W-M the first priority to study at.
Please remember to outline(bullets) the information, and REPHRASE it with an academic and sophisticated vocabulary. Thank you

appealing a decision

Paper details:

Unfortunately, I have received a denied admission for Spring 2016 from the university of W-M. write a strong email demonstrating compelling academic and/or personal information, as well as details pertaining to extenuating circumstances that were not addressed in my previous application.
Here is the information to be included in my email. Please make sure to clearly outline the reasons.
I think the first reason why they are unable to offer me an admission is because they have received the English proficiency which is the IELTS score too late. In fact, the delay was from the testing agency, and I have contacted them many times in order to have my results sent to the university’s office, but it took a quit long time to arrive. It was out of my hand, and I strongly believe that this the first reason why they turned away my application. However, I have got an overall band 6.5 on IELTS test, and that the score they need.
I attained infallible academic achievement in my high school level. I occupied the first place over my region which is with a mean score of 98.8% in the overall science subjects. This achievement has merited the attention of many scholarships and corporations in my country which offered me opportunity to study in USA. However, I chose the Emirates Nuclear Energy Corporation (ENEC) which offered to sponsor my university education in the field of engineering at the university of W-M.
I have completed level seven (the last level of Language program) at Georgia . I got straight A’s and that is difficult for students to achieve in the last level since they have many works to do such doing research papers ,preparing for the presentations, reading one whole book every weekend ,and participating in community service. In addition, I have been an active member in discussion groups. Also, I took service learning course at the language institute, which will definitely assist me well to contribute. For example, recently, I have volunteered at the Community Food bank.
Finally, my mother has been divorced since 1998, and I have been living with her in the same house, and father lives far away from us to avoid staying in touch with us, but it doesn’t matter as long as I live between my mother’s hands. She always wants me to be in higher positions so that she can be proud of me. And in order to be so, I have considered the university of W-M the first priority to study at.
Please remember to outline(bullets) the information, and REPHRASE it with an academic and sophisticated vocabulary. Thank you